There Will Be No Banging on THIS Toy!!

If you’re searching for a gift idea for that certain special someone in the next holiday season, then there’s really no need to look any further than the upcoming Handsome Dick Manitoba bobble-head doll. Aggronautix Toys’ fall release of a limited edition 9-inch version of the Handsome One will immortalize him with other such glitterati as GG Allin, Milo from the Descendents, and Roky Erikson. All preserved forever via the art of bobble.

The news of this pending arrival sent the staff at DFFD Headquarters scurrying to find space on the tchotchke shelf. The BOC cowbell, the Spinal Tap codpiece, the Bun E. brand back truss, and the Maybe Elvis toenail have been rearranged to accommodate their new roomie.

With that job in the rear-view mirror, we can now turn our attention to the more important matter at hand, namely — just what is this thing gonna LOOK like? We’ve seen many different looks from HDM over the years: Jewfro, clean-cut, blues patch, do-rag, buff and not so buff. Those are probably too many options to choose from, so we’ve narrowed the possibilities down to what we think are the top 3 choices.

Here is one artist’s imagining of what the bobble-head will most likely resemble:

Option 1: An iconic look, first album-era Manitoba in his high school wrestling togs.

Option B: Another popular look, here we have wrestling jacket Manitoba. The sculptor may have to trim those guns down just a smidge.

Finally, we have Option 3: The buff HDM of the 90’s and 00’s.

Which one is YOUR fave??

— Salvi C.